I ordered a shirt about eating a hot dog because my grandma said, "If I didn't have to limit my sodium intake, I'd eat a hotdog every day." It was a perfect shirt for her to give on mothers day. So I ordered one and it came in the mail.
Once I got the box I knew something was wrong. It has a serious tobacco smell to it. At first I thought I accidently ordered some nasty cigar they thought up on their podcast.
That wasn't the case. When I opened the box it's when I found they had used a bunch of cigarette butts as packing foam. I figured no big deal because they are a bunch of degenerates that need to save money so they make use of their vices as proficient as possible.
When I was cleaning out the box I noticed a message. It said, "you are the winner of our contest and it's a free vacation to Indiana, I figured I had nothing better to do because I had some paid time off and my girlfriend from Canada wasn't around for a while. I decided i'm in.
I decided to drive down and I ended up getting bored so I decided to show up to the place early. I figured it be more polite to be early than late since I knew this vacation had to be important to them. boy I was wrong.
First off when I came to the door they interrogated me. They wanted to know who I was with and if I was single. I told them I was single at the moment but I had my friends showing up soon and I wouldn't be single soon.
They looked me down and said I can come in until they show up but I wasn't allowed in their main room. I thought that was fine so I went into separate room they said was for single people. I was fine with that until they lead me into the room and closed the door behind me and the door locked from the outside. I still think the Fire Marshal would be very upset if I told them.
Anyway I waited in the room with some of the most enigmatic freaks I've ever encountered on this earth.
I was starting to think about kicking the door down because the place was all solid concrete walls with no windows. For the love of god the door opened and I met the 2 fellas.
I was just happy to get out of that room so I decided to go into the main ball room with them. This is where it kind of didn't get as weird as I thought it would.
One of the guys refused to take his shoes off so they wouldn't let him further than the door. He took off everything else but he wouldn't take off his shoes so they just made him stand at the door and watch.
The other guy went along because it was supposedly an investigation he was doing so I followed him around and ate all the loaded nachos and fettuccine alfredo bowls laying around the beds.
I got bored so I took the rest of the food and piled it up in this booth with a red and green light in it. I set it to green once it was above the various holes and got out.
over all I'm glad I did it but id never do it again.
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