"Please provide UPS with the security access that they need to deliver this package." Over the last two weeks, I have tried every way to somehow provide the delivery driver with my mobile phone number or the security access code that they keep requesting. I have had daily calls with UPS representatives. And each call - every one - follows a familiar arc, some new voice lighting up to tell me that, actually, the driver has tried to deliver it to the address. However, there has been an issue with the security access. Their voices drop a little when I interrupt, and I feel bad explaining that this is maybe the 14th time that I have had this conversation. Please, one moment, while I look into this for you. My mobile phone number must be on a brigade of carrier pigeons that they are surely using to communicate to the depot, my security access code plastering the Dublin depot wall in post-it notes. Now, I admit that I'm no expert in international logistics, but those don't seem like good solutions. I thought that I had found a solution, though, and was delighted when I received a notification to say that my request to have this parcel picked up at a Pick-Up point was being processed. But, yesterday afternoon, I received a notification, reading like the obituary for someone you had been hoping would pull through - "Please provide UPS with the security access that they need to deliver this package." In many ways, I feel envious of those whose reviews conclude that their delivery had just been lost, or even left in the jaws of rabid dogs in a neighbouring field. I do genuinely believe that that would be better than this continuingly boring cycle - it would certainly make for a more interesting daily conversation with a UPS representative. But I have now reached a point of such dejection that I simply don't care about the contents of my package anymore. I don't care if I receive them, I don't care if I don't. I'm not sure if I care if I get refunded. I just want this sorry foray into this hellish maze of unprocessed queries and notifications and I-Can-Look-Into-This-For-You to just end. I simply do not care anymore.
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